| 35 Uni | 28 Dec 900 |
| Volume 13 |
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Abandon Kills Again. The residents of Downtown huddle in their house in fear of
the killer known as 'Abandon'. The bodies of 4 SLA Operatives were found
skinned and hung like pieces of meat from the Solomons Walkway this morning.
SHIVER's were on the scene and attributed the kills to this viscious killer.
The SLA squad (name withheld) are believed to have been killed in hand
to hand combat and the official word is that
A CHRISTMAS STORY Good Saint Nick was found decapitated on Mort, in fact, many
jolly souls, dressed up in Saint Nick costumes where found decapitated
throughout Mort on Christmas morning, with a total count so far of 26 heads.
It appears Santa Claws has struck again this year, putting fear into another
holiday and breaking last years record of 24 heads.
POST OFFICE GETS THROUGH
The holidays have come and gone for another year and the
postal departments will be getting back to a normal routine again. Mail
may still be delayed a few extra days, as the final holiday letters get
delivered.
BOOK REVIEWS 1 Volume 12 of tHE bIG pICTURE is hot off the presses.
Inside you'll find many useful articles, such as:
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Alien Sex Channel
SIC TV
Channel 8
A DAY IN THE LIFE Robert Smith, SCL 8C, Mort Times
This Week: The Magazine Editor
RS: Name?
RS: How long have you been the editor of tHE bIG pICTURE?
RS: What do you enjoy most as the editor?
RS: Ok, what do you hate most?
RS: What is the most difficult past of being the editor?
RS: Is there anything else you'd like to say?
RS: Thank you for your time
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The acceptable alcohol level of drivers is being made stricter. The blood alcohol levels are being raised to .08 and become effect on December 31, 900 SD. Skin Traders seem to be increasing there activities in the
Mornington Cresent area. Young women are advised against traveling
alone at night in this area.
MORT CARRIEN LOTTO This weeks winning numbers are:
Jackpot is current 1,920,000u 5 numbers = free ticket.
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Drivers wanted for Jiffy Pizza. All applicants must have a license and clean driving record. If you want your pizzas in a hurry, just call Jiffy. Do you have what it takes to be a Shiver? Contact you local Shiver Station to apply. Great Pay, good benefits and job security. Help protect Mort and serve SLA Industries. Serve the Monarch Police and protect your community. Specialized training, career options and plenty of opportunities for advancement is only a phone call away. Contact your local Monarch Police Station and help end the violence. Power Projects is looking for subjects to
News reporters needed. If you have a story, we want to print it. Serious inquiries only. Contact Eric Larsen at 03-129-4729 Do you have what it takes to make money, survive and claim the admiration of your fellow man. "Shooting Things For Money" is looking for you! Contact Gorezone at 07-STF-MONEY. |
1) tHE bIG pICTURE, is an awesome fanzine. If you haven't bought yours, what are you waiting for? Maybe hoping for a visit by Cloak for this subversive act of not buying this superior product?